4/5/2011 “I love you with all my heart. I can’t wait until we move into our new house. We’ll have so much time together.” That is a recent text from my “troubled teen.” I put that in quotations purposely—that’s what a mother will wait a lifetime to hear, and when she does, she forgets the past in an instant. She tells me these types of things quite often, and I truly believe that’s how she feels. However, there’s a part…
I’ve spent a lot of time talking and fretting over my younger child with all the problems, past and present. Sure, she’s been a major focus of my parenthood, and the subject of this blog, but I’ve realized that it’s not fair. Leaving my first born out doesn’t paint a complete picture of my mothering skills, my life, my younger daughter’s life, or our family in general. First born is the closest thing to an angel that you’ll ever get….
1/21/2011 I have a split personality, minus the mental illness (though some days I’m not so sure about that). I am two mothers in one body—one mother whose daughter is more of a challenge than she should have to handle, and another mother who hides this reality from the world. The mother with the troubled daughter worries to the point of having ulcers, muscle aches, heart aches, hours of weeping, and bouts of anxiety. She lies awake at night wondering…