4/14/2011 I admit it, I’m a fan of reality TV, and I’m a regular viewer of Teen Mom. It’s not that I relate to that program, it’s that there but for the grace of God goes my family. I have two teenage daughters and my “troubled teen” began being sexually active around the age of 15 (that’s what she has told me, though kids lie and she has done quite a bit of lying). I’m glad that Teen Mom depicts how tragic being a teen mom is, instead of glorifying having “someone to love.” I follow the characters to see if there are any similarities in propensities to my kids. Do they have the same insecurities? Desperations? Blinders?

That said, I speak to my girls about sex and its consequences—emotional, physical, mental, medical, and procreative. Neither of my children are in any hurry to become mothers, having seen my struggles as a single mom even at my age. They like being young and having very few responsibilities. They couldn’t imagine the little money they’re able to earn as a teen going toward diapers and baby medicine and not Red Bulls and nose rings. They couldn’t imagine being up all night with a crying baby instead of having a sleepover with their friends.

I’m relieved that that’s their attitude, but I still put both kids on the pill as a precaution. Some parents would be horrified by my actions, but it’s frankly none of their business. I’m not religious, but even if I was, with all that we’ve been through in our family, bringing an innocent baby into the fold would be more horrifying. My girls, as wonderful as they’ve become, have a hard enough time taking care of themselves properly. My younger daughter is still working on being responsible for her cats and remembering to feed them.

So , the program is entertaining, but it’s also a good springboard for talking to your teenagers frankly about the ramifications of sexual activity. Do they want to work two jobs, quit high school, be up all night with a colicky baby, spend all their money on diapers and formula, isolate themselves from regular teenage life, be tired all the time, risk being lonely and having their relationships break up, feel angry and resentful, and derail their hopes and dreams?

For these reasons, I actually recommend the show Teen Mom. I feel sad for the characters and wish them well, but I don’t have much hope for them having fulfilling lives and I think most of those poor babies are doomed. Every day that my teenager daughters remain childless, I say “thank you” to my higher power and “you’re welcome” to my nerves!