9/26/2012 How does so much time go by? Life changes so quickly and I keep forgetting to chronicle all the adventures and important minutiae. As of August 1, 2012, my formerly troubled teen moved back in with me. I asked her to, believe it or not. I didn’t like the way she was living—her apartment was dirty and, even though I went over to clean it every now and again, it was painful to see how gross she decided to…
9/26/2012 So we spent the months of June, July, and August a mess. My formerly troubled daughter had to get one last thing on her bucket list: an abortion. A few months ago, she started to complain about being really sick to her stomach, even vomiting all night. At first, I just thought she had eaten something nasty or caught something. But it kept happening. One day, I took her grocery shopping at WinCo. and she described some other symptoms…
7/23/2012 I know that sounds absolutely horrible, but this comes after a beautiful three-week visit with my 20-year-old. She came home to unwind from her life in the Bay Area, which frankly is better than my life. She spent her time flitting from friend to friend, hanging out with me, and reconnecting with her somewhat-troubled-teen-whom-this-blog-is-about-sister. She only had one bad day—after a lunch with a high school friend who’s parents are very wealthy and give her everything on a silver platter,…
3/2/2012 I started this blog when my younger of two daughters was 16 and had been trouble with a capital T since 6th grade. Over the past couple of years—after 4 wrecked cars, countless court dates, no less than three bags of pot discovered, and so much more—I can say with great certainty that I don’t think my daughter is a fuck-up after all. Daughter’s been working at a very good job for over a year and is loved and respected…
2/6/2012 You may judge me negatively—I sure would if I were you—but here’s what I did. A few posts back I mentioned that my daughter dyed her hair an ugly fluorescent red color and I freakin’ hated it. I did keep my mouth shut, but she still knew how I felt about it. When she tried to get a promotion at work and was turned down, I couldn’t help but take that opportunity to say that the interviewer most likely judged…
2/6/2012 The empty nest thing is working out ok, I must say. The highlight is having greatly reduced stress in my everyday life. Sure, I still worry like a madwoman about my girls, but I am learning that no news is good news. If I don’t hear from them for a day or two, they’ve told me I can assume it’s because they’re simply busy going about their lives. Not having their everyday issues in my face is a mad…
1/10/2012 I’m very proud of my formerly troubled daughter. She is just like her mother and older sister in that she has a tremendous work ethic and strives to excel. Here’s some of the compliments, stats, and accolades she’s forwarded to me in the last few months. This is a good foundation for her future and tells me she really is my real child! After a collection phone call, a customer asked to speak to my daughter’s manager. This is…
1/9/2012 I’ve discovered the number-one reason to accept your empty nest status—it is the single best way to improve your relationships with your children, especially the troublesome ones. Suddenly, you see all your hard work, nurturing, guiding, and good sense flowing from your offspring. It’s sort of like when they were little—you’d send them to a friend’s house and the parents would tell you what great manners your child had, something you didn’t see so much at home! No longer…
12/22/2011 We celebrate Hanukkah—well, we used to. This year everything feels strange for me. The way I would explain it is I’ve been blindfolded and twirled for five full minutes then released. Now I’m utterly disoriented and have to carry on as if floor isn’t do-si-do-ing beneath me. I miss my children and the candlelighting and the gift-giving and the latke-making and the card-writing. I know that they had to grow up eventually, but I just didn’t think it would…
12/16/2011 So what the hell is wrong with me? Today is my daughter’s official move out day and, despite all my cheering that I couldn’t wait for this to finally happen, I actually feel like crying. I love her soooooo much and already miss her and am worried sick about her being on her own. Despite knowing logically that she’s smart and savvy, and can handle the responsibility, it’s the same as admitting that she doesn’t need me anymore. She’s…